Thursday, February 18, 2010

Script: Utterly Rucked, part fourteen

Almost finished episode nineteen yesterday, and made sure I had rough page breakdowns for all the remaining parts. It's racing to a bloody climax ...

Penalty Kick

by David Tulloch

Page ONE
The team are looking a bit shaggy, hairy and worse for wear after spending a night in the pub. Have sleeping bags visible in the background to show this.

Patton: "Morning, mate."
Burnsie: "Morning. What's for breakfast?"

Patton: "Cold pizza and colder beer."
Burnsie: "Sounds pretty good."

Patton: "Sleep well?"
Burnsie: "Not really. No."

Patton: "Oh? The floor a bit hard for ya?"
Burnsie: "I can sleep anywhere, mate. It's just ... "

Burnsie: "Something occurred to me last night. If one of us was the killer then locking us all in the bar would have been just ideal. He'd have killed us all in our sleep."

Patton: "Oh Christ! I shouldn't thought of that."
Burnise: "I tried to keep myself awake ... just in case. But I drifted off about three. Had one doozy of a dream."

Page TWO

Patton looking relived.
Patton: "So that means the killer isn't one of us."

Burnsie: "Well ... either than or even homicidal maniacs need their beauty sleep."
Patton: "I guess. But I reckon it makes it more likely it's someone else."

Burnsie: "Like Paddy. Or your ex-wife?"
Patton: "Yeah. Or someone else. I still think it could be Wayne the ref."

Burnsie: "My money's on Cheryl. You blokes have really screwed her over."
Patton: "Cheryl? I just don't see that. She's a slut, not a psycho. She has a heart of gold."

Burnsie: "You still suspect the Inspector?"
Patton: "Nah. She's okay. I reckon I might make my move on her later."

Burnsie: "Jeez, mate. You haven't got a snowball's."


Patel: "You have got to be joking?"

Patton: "I'm serious, darling. You and me should date when this is over. All this death and stuff has made me appreciate how important life is ...."

Patton: " ... How important love is."

Patel: "Mr Patterson ... in my role as lead on this case I have developed extensive profiles on all of your team. The file on you is, quite appropriately, rather thick."

Patel: "The psychological section is particularly enlightening, and sheds a great deal of light into your motivations and desires ... "

Patel: "... and you wouldn't know what love was if it was stuffed up your arsehole with a cucumber."

Patton and Burnsie sitting at the bar. There is also another teammate right there next to them. Trevor "Daggy" Crowly (number 18), one of the substitutes.

Burnsie: "Shot down in flames, mate?"
Patton: "Nah. I'm in there I reckon. She's warming to my charms."

Burnsie: "Didn't look that that to me. She looked pissed."
Patton: "Yeah, well, I ignite passion in her. That's gotta be a good start."

Patton: "And nothing bad happened last night. Everyone's safe. We should celebrate."
Burnsie: "I'll drink to that."

Patton: "Let's have something a bit special. Whiskey?"
Burnsie: "Yeah. Why not."

Patton asking the teammate close to them at the bar, Daggy, who is just getting up from his seat.
Patton: "Hey, Daggy. You want a whiskey?"
Daggy: "Sure, Captain. Just have to make room first."

Daggy heads to the toilet ... and his doom! Show him opening the men's toilet door.

The killer lies in wait in the men's toilet. The toilet has those louvered glass windows that (used to be) so common. I know from experience how easy it is to remove the louvered panes and crawl through to get into a pub. But don't worry ... I was a good boy; I lived in the pub and we'd locked ourselves out. Anyway, that's how the killer has gained access to the toilets. You can show the panes on the floor if you like. Note that the killer is wearing odd shoes, as described in a panel below.

Point of view (POC) of the killer. Daggy unzipping on his way to the urinal.

Daggy realizing he's not alone and readjusting his trousers.
Daggy: "Oh! What are you doing in here?"

Daggy looking concerned.
Daggy: "You okay, love?

POV of Daggy looking down at the killer's footwear.
Daggy: "Are those rugby boots you're wearing?"

POV of the killer looking down at their own shoes, which are rugby boots, but modified so the studs are on the upper of the shoe.
Daggy: "The studs are on the wrong side. Why would you do that to them?"

Page SIX

Large frame of the killer kicking Daggy in the groin with the stud-pointing uppers going right in the bollocks. Have the killer's body obscured by a toilet stall door or something, so the identity is still not certain (I'm sure you've all guessed by now).

Daggy down on the ground, clutching his groin in extreme agony ... so much so barely a groan escapes him.
Killer (off): "That's why."
Daggy: "urrrkle"

NEXT: Number 8 Wire
Logo by Guy Landry

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