Went to a great opera last night. Very silly plot. Most of them are. Very nicely staged. Well sung. And it had three babes in gold lame bikinis who hopped around on moon-hoppers at one point.
I like going to the opera. It's nice to be in a crowd in which my mere presence lowers the average age. But I do have my issues with large groups of people milling about.
Whenever we go to an event like the opera there is always a bit of jostling with the crowd to get to your seat. I have noticed that there is a gender difference at play in the dynamics at such events. My wife can plough through a crowd, and they part like the red sea. As for me, well, I'm the charioteers chasing after the Israelites ... the waters rush back leaving me to drown in a sea of cultured coats and ties.
I've taken to clinging onto the back of my wife's coat when she moves through a crowd. If I stay close and look as though I'm connected to her, like a clingy child or a bizarre hoop-skirt, then I have a better chance of making it to my seat unscathed.
My only continuing disappointment with the opera is the lack of opera-dogs, or opera-fries ... or even opera-pita-pockets. Sure, they have wine and ice-cream, but somehow that's never enough. A good curry, or maybe a cheese platter would have enhanced my watching of bouncing bikini babes tremendously.
You could even have themes for the opera foods: Devil's food cake for Faust, sushi for The Mikado, slightly off sauerkraut for any of Wagner's works, something minimalist --- two peas and a baby carrot --- for a Philip Glass opera, wedding cake for the Marriage of Figaro .... Hmm, perhaps if this writing lark doesn't take off I have a career in theme-catering for musical events?
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